How To Positively Keep Toxic People In Your Life That You Already Have!

So, you have toxic people in your life that you love but can’t stand sometimes or a lot of the time, do ya?

The golden question is, though, “How can I have this person in my life in a positive way?” 🤔

When it comes to people you love that always seem to be toxic in how they talk to you and how they think about almost everything, there is a way to balance having them in your life while not letting them bring you down!

I know firsthand how hard of a relationship it can be when someone super close to you in your family is just not a good fit for who you are desperately trying to become.

You work extremely hard to make your dream goals happen, and it’s easy enough already to get yourself confused on your way there. So adding on the stress of your close family’s opinions of what you’re doing doesn’t really help!

Just talking to them about the simplest things can sometimes seem to drive you crazy, and no one wants that kind of stress on a daily.

You have massive goals to get and, therefore, new habits, routines, and ways of thinking that you need to stick to for you to make this all happen!

You want a better lifestyle for whatever your reasoning and your why drive for getting you there is strong.

You wake up every morning and go to bed every night, envisioning the life you see yourself living. This becomes your motivation and drive every day to get all of these never-ending seeming tasks done for your goals!

But whenever you seem to talk to this person or people in your life that are quite honestly hard to ignore because they are your mom, dad, grandma, whoever close person to you, it can feel like an ongoing battle with yourself and this person to stay true to who you really are and follow through with making your dream goals happen!

Yes, you love this person dearly, but you also only have this one life to live.

With that being the case, you most certainly don’t want to waste it thinking of how things could have been “if you only did this” but instead never went for it because you let other people convince you to stay lesser!

In our last blog post here we went through questions for you to ask yourself if you should allow certain people into your life or if they are toxic and will only bring you down.

So in relation to that, this article is the follow-up for those that need to learn how to positively keep toxic people in your life that you already have.

Because let’s be honest, grandma, mom, dad, and aunty Mae will be in your life whether they are toxic or not!

Always remember this:

You can’t change other people.

* You’ve just got to accept them for who they are. You can only change yourself and your perspective, not how someone else carries on with their time and lives their life.*

Sure, you can tell them your perspective on life and why it is, but you can’t make them stop what they are doing in their lives to fit into yours.

So, with that being said, don’t be upset about having the people you care most about in your life being a little toxic in their nature.

There are ways to go about keeping them in your life without pulling you down and creating a mass amount of headaches along the way!

Trust, it’s no fun arguing with toxic people to try and make them see things your way and where you’re coming from.

Yeah, sure, it takes more effort on your part than theirs, at least in the beginning, but if you’d like to make your life badass while still having those you love in it, in a positive and understanding way, then it takes effort.

I know that I’ve had this struggle throughout my life when it came to the topic of family.

With everything that I’ve learned in my life, and keep on learning for that matter, I simply can’t accept certain things that I used to when I was younger.

To be honest, when you’re a kid and even a young adult growing up, it’s hard to say no to your family. You pretty much don’t have the choice.

However, when you get older, it’s your choice of who you let into your life and how. When it comes to family, there are a few ways you could play things out.

Finding Your Options:

1. Accept them for who they are and learn to develop a positive way of interacting with them.

You can do this by taking the contrast of past conversations and situations of how they’ve got it right or wrong and implement good ways of action that you think would be best for you to follow through with.

I can’t tell you the exact lines of sentences that you need to say to a person. Nor the tone of voice or levels of sarcasm in your tone. Only you know what’s best when it comes to this.

However, when you take the contrast of all that’s gone right and wrong before, it’s much easier to know how you should interact with a person to produce the results you want rather than the constant loop of outcomes you hate!

For example, if you know that your grandma is always a direct and short conversation kind of gal, then don’t let yourself get upset when she only talks to you directly in a forward ‘her way or the highway’ manner that you can’t get out of. You’ve just got to answer her questions.

Trying to do otherwise with this lady will only result in her thinking you don’t want to tell her things which will cause her to get upset and short with you.

Once that happens, there’s really no getting out of her thinking you’re one way in her mind for the duration of this conversation.

However, you can learn to answer her questions while also directing her in the direction you want to lead the conversation rather than letting her take the wheel and have absolutely nothing to say to you other than questions!

I.E., you start the conversation talking about something you want to talk about, and when she asks you questions, you answer them, but then ask her a related question flipped onto her instead of you!

Direct how you speak to her in a manner that will both answer her questions and provoke her to talk more about herself instead of only being a direct question about your life followed by the next one!

Let’s be honest, if you wanted to tell others things about your life freely, then you would.

Being provoked to forcefully share this information isn’t something that you’re comfortable with. And since you know how your grandma operates, you know how you should start your conversations and carry on with them!

This takes practice, but trust the process, and you’ll eventually find the right ways for you. 😅

2. Make Space.

If that route doesn’t seem to be working for you, then maybe some space is required to keep those toxic loved ones in your life but with limited contact and commitment!

Listen, you’ve got to accept people for who they are.

You can’t change them, and if you try, you’ll only create a toxic environment for you and that person every time you two speak!

It’s like every time you go and talk to them, they already have a sour taste in their mouth thinking about the last time that you two spoke, and so that’s how they’ll start the next new conversation with you.

So in these scenarios, it’s sometimes best to just give each other some time to breathe in between your interactions and then take the initiative to start your next conversation with this person more positively and keep on directing the line of thinking in this manner.

This way, when all else fails, you can make it apparent to this person in your life that you are trying to be different and make things more positive instead of negative and toxic.

Making actions obvious to see by constantly keeping your cool and being positive will become obvious to the other person when they always wind up being the one that gets upset and enraged in a super negative way!

These are two very simple and straightforward methods to implement. However, with practice, a little time, and patience, they can be very effective in your life!

So the next time you go talking to dear ol’ mom about how you’re going for your dream goals, try your best to keep your cool and be the one that directs the conversation in the ways of how you want it to go.

Keep on trying until you get it right. Then when that happens, just like starting a business or achieving any other large goal in your life, you’ll just need to maintain that momentum and progress so that it serves you well for years to come!

These are two simple ways to positively keep toxic people in your life that you already have!

Was this helpful for you?

Do you feel more of a drive and passion burning inside of you after reading this? 🔥

Maybe got a little bit of inspiration or motivation to help drive you towards achieving your own goals?

How about more knowledge and tools for your toolbox? 🧰

I hope so. That was the intent of this article! We are always trying our best over here to help you become better than yesterday and achieve your large, overly ambitious sounding goals!

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But until next time, and as always,

Be who the heck you are-Be who you rawr;

Don’t just talk about how you want your life to be!

Instead, start becoming it. 🙌🏻🤗

Stay true to who you really are because you can do this thing!

With much love,

XOXO, -JulieRannaSaurus 💖💖